As We Have Grown Up- The Mystery Of Life

Life is like a river, its flowing, turning and twisting. When we are born first we don't even know our name. Our parents name us, a background, a culture and a religion automatically become yours for rest of your life. For the first 4-5 years of life we even don't know who are we? what is our identity? why we are born? what we will be doing for the whole life? who is God? what is my religion?. As we pass this phase of self recognition(this phase mostly continues for the whole life), we than proceed to meet friends and the other 10 years we spent are just for knowing people, making friends, unwinding the relationship complexities. We spent that era by thinking most of the time about people and trying to answer the question" What people will think? what will they say? if I do this or that? ". This era is really tiresome, complex and time consuming. Than, when we are matured, we worry about love issues, family matters, children, job, a big house and a very good social status. In my opinion, human's are programmed, they are designed in a manner that we are never happy with our current state. We are striving and struggling for something constantly through out our life. In this hustle and bustle of " life" I try to find "life", the lost life, the forgotten and for granted life. Personally, I always question myself that "Saima ! Have you ever lived your life?. Saima! were you ever present in the present? Saima! do you have the answer and the justification for your existence?. Saima! what is ahead? What about life after death as they say? Saima! where are you going? who are you?". I find it really difficult to answer these questions. I feel my self lost against the mystery of life. Sometimes, I wish to die and know what is after that life? 

Today when I look back sitting in Australia on my writing desk, I realise that I have lived a beautiful life but when I was living it, I was present there physically but not mentally. My mind was always in the future. I miss my friends and the time with them, I miss my parents and their love, I miss my youthful and wild days. Indeed, it seem like I am now living in the past, questioning the future and enduring the present with exemplary courage. 

Life's mystery is so complicated. Try to enjoy what ever you have today. Live the life and never let it go because it is the way the life is.